Passion, Judgement and Limitation

as i sit here, post run, i can’t help but think of the topic of judgement.

as a female runner, being cat called and verbally poked at while running is something i am no stranger to.  lately though, it hasn’t been making me as angry as it used to…just sad.  what kind of world have we come to create where people feel comfortable mocking each other while they are living wholeheartedly in their passions?

i’ll tell you, it takes a lot of searching, and then dedication, to be passionate about something.  but when you find that something, it is extremely rewarding (sometimes frustrating).  so why do we feel like we can cast judgement on another person when they are just trying to live their truth.  is it because so many of us haven’t taken the time to find our passion?  or maybe, we have, but life has somehow made it difficult for us to follow it, deeply?

i’m not going to sit here and pretend i’m not guilty of never casting judgment on someone or pretend i’ve never poked fun at someone for something they like.  but, i will say, this is something i’ve taken some time to think about a lot lately.  and i will tell you, it’s a hell of a lot more rewarding to keep a soft heart and live in acceptance of other’s journeys, rather than judgement.  i used to let my experiences harden me…make me tougher (if that’s even the word) but honestly, i think it is “tougher” to keep a soft heart…to look at the world, other humans, other beings with compassion.

i have the privilege of working with children and so often i am in awe of how compassionate and soft they are.  they never judge each other, or themselves (which can be even more difficult) because they can’t draw as well as they’d like, they enjoy the process of creating something.  they don’t criticize their friends because they can’t read a book as well as they can…they help each other figure it out and celebrate progress.

when does that all stop though? when do we become hardened?

…so i’m daring you…

FIND YOUR PASSION. go deeply into it. PUSH YOURSELF TO YOUR EDGE.  move past it when you’re ready.  LOOK AT OTHERS WITH COMPASSION.  don’t judge anyone else’s journey.  KEEP A SOFT HEART.  celebrate your victories.  CELEBRATE EACH OTHER’S VICTORIES.

we aren’t going to be perfect.  i’m not, and i don’t want to be.  it’s the effort we put in…that’s what counts.  you don’t know my struggle and i don’t know yours.  but, we can take the time to accept ourselves which (hopefully) leads to the acceptance of others.  our effort to create a better world for each other makes us better and we are all only responsible for ourselves in this process.

“The ability to observe without evaluating is the highest form of intelligence.”

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Where is your happiness?

ugghhhhh happiness…am I right??? WRONG!

lately, i’ve been spending a lot of time thinking, talking, reflecting on this topic that seems so…unreachable to many.

but, i am happy.

truly, happy.

“how?!” 

honestly, it’s because i spent a lot of time being truly UNHAPPY.   i got dumped, i chose to spend more time crying about it than necessary (honestly, i ran out of tears sometimes).  i stayed in a city (far, far away from the one i am from) that i moved to for that relationship.  i spent time dwelling (and dwelling on the fact that i was dwelling).  i thought i would never find anyone, ever again (this just isn’t true, no matter how true it feels).

but…you know what was waiting for me outside my new, very empty, bedroom?

HAPPINESS

i started choosing to spend my time alone, doing things i liked.  things i forgot about doing when i started doing things just because my partner wanted to do them.  things that made me forget about being sad…things that wouldn’t let me be sad unless i wanted to cry in public (which happens anyway).

and you know what i found?

I AM PRETTY FREAKING COOL.  (this is a true fact that needs no ones approval except my own)

we spend so much time trying to make connections, doing what we think we are supposed to be doing. trying to find success in work or relationships or just being accepted by others, in general, that we don’t spend any time trying to accept ourselves.

i have spent the last 9 months on the most incredible journey of living my own truth.  i have spent more time with myself in the last 9 months than i have in my almost 27 years on this earth.  and sadly, i haven’t met many people who do the same.

spend time with yourselves, people.

get a hobby.  learn something new.  take some pictures.  buy a plant.  run.  walk.  pick your nose in the comfort of knowing that no one is watching.  do something scary.  sit in your house and make a list of all the things you love about yourself.  but please, for the love of who/whatever you believe in, join me in happiness!

“And if I asked you to name all the things you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?”